A good friend recently told me about an almost 300 day challenge to write something substantial once a day until the end of the year. This is something that I have wanted to do in spirit for a while now. It was the premise by which this blog started a long time ago. A promise is something I try to keep but as much as I may try, I must admit that there are things that while under my control have never been something I can keep. It is a weakness and a personal shame of mine that I want to surpass and I need to start at least with my own academic integrity. A promise is a promise as the old saying goes but the premise of a challenge just has an extra gravitas to it. So as the legendary Barney Stinson would say: Challenge Accepted!
Dissertating is still slow and steady (well not as steady as I would like) but it continues. There are some cool things on the horizon which will be announced soon enough. In the meantime, dissertating summaries or just something significant will be posted here before going to bed or else. Time for some mental discipline. If I can head to the gym a few days a week and almost destroy y muscles I can flex my brain and show it on a regular basis. So I give permission for someone to insult me via whatever means necessary if there is no post by the morning.
Story time: Last night I had a hard time sleeping due to vague reasons. I can’t really explain it but when I have a good night’s rest the dreams are a huge blur of comfortable fuzziness. In that discomfort, the oneiric state stays longer in my memory. I vividly remember going through some kind of book that was trying to be good for a more progressive understanding of gender roles and then, mid dream mind you, I realize that it’s not feminist friendly at all. The first story was a girl that was a combination of Merrida from that movie whose name escapes me and Eliza Thornberry from that cool Nickelodeon show from the 90s. The character was a young girl with wildish red curly hair that lived out in the jungle/Serengeti and communed with nature. The overall idea of showing a female teenage Tarzan style figure seemed good at first glance but then critical theory analytical subconscious stepped in was pretty adamant as to the whole Othering of this “wild girl” who doesn’t belong in regular society. There’s this weird relationship between the exotic and the exiled that I should explore later on in more detail.
Second story that was there involved two sisters. I think they were some odd anthropomorphization of something but let’s go with regular old humans for this one. Anyway, one sister decided to have a career and travel the world while the other fell in love, got married, had kids, and became a homemaker. Every year or so, the two would meet and tell each other of their experiences. Each would be a little jealous of the other but never regret their current lives. It seemed nice that the depiction of apparent domesticity versus career development was not at odds but down the line the one that chose family had just that while the other only had sisterly love to fall back on. It was a weird choice that my subconscious made that my subconscious was simultaneously judging as hurtful towards showing that not having kids somehow leads to an unfulfilling life. Maybe I think too much about these things for a would be feminist who doesn’t even have sisters (at least not of the genetic variety).
Ultimately, both stories in my dreams tried to subvert the whole hegemonic patrimony and yet further enforced it. The fact that I want to create such stories while being aware of their potential contradictory and do both subconsciously perplexes me. I don’t know how much of an effect I will have towards gender equality at any level but apparently I want to try. Maybe I’ll help make GoldieBlox the videogame or Saturday morning cartoon or whatever.